[memora]

Well, I guess it's about time I stopped spending so much time playing games and actually work on my story. Contrary to what it seems, it's less of a drama and more of a modern-day fantasy in terms of genre. I still need to polish it a bit, especially the dialogue at the end, but this will give you guys an indication of my writing style and pacing.

* * * * *
LAMENT OF A GODDESS

Every story has a beginning and an end
But can we discern between the two?
Every tale seems to want to pretend
That fantasy is, in actuality, true
Every heart is filled with both envy and pride
Or worse, a tormenting regret
And every life has a secret to hide
Some past memory we desire to forget

This world is cold, dark and desolate
A miserable place where no hope grows
Where people are driven mad and desperate
By their fears, by their anxieties and woes
I wept and wept in endless streams
Remembering those who had died
But wept no more one day, it seems
When the last of my tears had dried

I wonder how many sunrises I have seen
And how many moons have passed me by?
I wonder how many ages it has been
Since I`ve forgotten how to cry?
When was it that I lost my smile?
Was it when I learned to hate?
Why is it that I feel denial
Unable to accept my star-told fate?

When my dreams fall from starry skies
As the sun perishes, ceasing to shine
Will any tears come flooding to my eyes
Will sadness invade this heart of mine
Or will I fight even stronger
Casting aside this shroud of death
Yet, how much longer must I wait
How much longer...
Waiting... Waiting...
To take my final breath

Chapter 1 – A Reason to Live
KISEKI’S DIARY, January 12
“The world is going to die, Diary-san, and it’s all my fault. It’s because I wasn’t able to control my anger and hatred. It’s because there was too much pain in my heart. I tried… I tried very hard to remain strong, but deep down, I’m just a weak and helpless little girl. Is it wrong to want to be loved? Is it wrong to want to have someone care for me? I just don’t know what to think anymore…

My heart hurts, Diary-san. I don’t want anyone to know what I have done. What would they think of me? Would they call me a coward – someone who couldn’t control her emotions? Would they say that I was a weak-willed girl who decided to blame the world instead of blaming myself? Perhaps, they are right. Perhaps…

I can’t face this world any more. I’m just not strong enough. Surely, this is the end of my story, Diary-san. This is the end of our time together. All I can say is “goodbye… dear friend…” I did not want it to end this way, but fate has told me that I don’t belong here any more…”

Kiseki stopped writing and closed her diary. Slowly, she raised it and nestled it against her chest. “Goodbye, my friend,” she whispered, as tears streamed from her closed eyes. “Only you know of my pain…”
She placed the book on the ground and slumped herself against a giant tree. It was the same one that she often visited when she was small, back when both of her parents were still alive. Those were better times, filled with love and vibrant life, but those times had now passed.
“Be my messenger, Diary-san. Tell everyone that I was too afraid to watch the world end…”

Kiseki’s entire body shook, as she reached down to pick up the blade that she had brought with her. She trembled immensely, as she braced it against her left wrist, anticipating what was to come. She then made a cutting motion with her right hand and immediately, a wave of excruciating pain washed over her. Even through a curtain of tears, she could see crimson slowly gushing from her wound. Soon, very soon, she thought to herself. The pain… It hurt. It hurt a lot… but something was wrong. Kiseki suddenly realized that her mind had remained clear all that time, despite the immense pain. The cut had sent reverberations up her hand towards her brain, where the pain compounded endlessly. She felt every beat and throb banging away there and realized that she would not fall out of consciousness. Quickly, she cupped the palm of her hands together, closed her eyes and muttered several words under her breath. Gradually, she felt the throbbing pain in both her mind and wrist subside. She then brushed aside the tears she had wept and looked at her arm and wrist. They were stained crimson from all the blood that had spewed, but when she wiped it with a flick of her right palm, she saw no indication of the cut that she had just made. She looked around, in bewilderment. She saw no one. She then stared once again at her newly healed left arm. Many questions raced in her mind, but then she heard a voice, which roused her out of her thoughts.

“All I want to do is die! Why can’t you just let me?”

“Because you’re story wasn’t meant to end here, child,” the voice said. It was a feminine voice, speaking slowly but assuredly.

“Who are you?” Kiseki screamed out, almost instinctively. She looked around for the voice’s source, but wasn’t able to pinpoint it.

“Someone who doesn’t wish to see you die… yet…” the voice retorted.

No hint of fear struck Kiseki’s heart. In fact, she felt a degree of solace, being able to talk to someone at that moment, even a stranger. “I made a wish! I wished that the world would die!” Kiseki said to the sky, from which the voice emanated.

The stranger laughed. “Foolish child, you don’t have that kind of power!”

“But I know the world is suffering because of me. Just let me die!”
She bared her blade again.

“Cut yourself again and see what happens. See how long you can endure the pain before you use your powers once again.”

“Why are you tormenting me?”

“I need you to do something for me.”

She knelt down and picked up her diary. Gently, she nestled it to her chest, as if it was a child.
“Tell me what you want.”

“In this world, there exists a goddess - a wicked woman named Paradisa. Kill her and I will allow you to die.”

“No, I can’t. My heart won’t allow me to do such a thing.”

“Then, I won’t let you die

“…” (tears)

There was a pause… Then the voice spoke again.

“Listen to my story, child. After hearing it, I don’t think you will refuse me a second time.”
There was great cynicism in Kiseki’s heart, but she listened to the voice’s story nonetheless. As she did, her heart grew heavy again, plagued and burdened by sadness and grief. Kiseki’s heart bled and once again the tears returned to cover her vision in a watery haze. Yet, she felt it – a second emotion began to stir in her heart as well, an emotion that she long thought had died. Suddenly, a strange warmth filled her grieving heart – a strong resolve began pushing and motivating her. In that moment, she made a promise to the voice that she would kill Paradisa. In that moment, a girl who long had wanted to die finally found a reason to live… once again…

[Naughty Shrink]

Sounds good, but if you wanna write in english I suggest you:
- Drop the name suffix (-san etc).
- I would recommend writing something along the lines of "she cried" rather than "(tears)" unless you're writing a play.
- You should try to target the fantasy readers, not us anime-otaku.
- English name's are prefered in the litterary world, you WILL be discriminated against.

Then again you're free to write as you see fit, just giving some friendly pieces of advice^^.

[memora]

Originally Posted by Naughty Shrink

Sounds good, but if you wanna write in english I suggest you:
- Drop the name suffix (-san etc).
- I would recommend writing something along the lines of "she cried" rather than "(tears)" unless you're writing a play.
- You should try to target the fantasy readers, not us anime-otaku.
- English name's are prefered in the litterary world, you WILL be discriminated against.

Then again you're free to write as you see fit, just giving some friendly pieces of advice^^.

Oops, a couple of things I need to clarify, since I didn't post a synopsis. The frame of reference and setting of the story is modern-day Tokyo. Of course, if I set it in a primarily English setting, I wouldn't have forced the japanese conventions (names and naming conventions) into a "westernized" story. When I said my story was a modern fantasy, I didn't want to imply "medieval" fantasy, but rather imaginary (and perhaps unexplainable) occurences in a modern setting, like a Bakemonogatari for example. Sorry for the confusion...