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Tremble!
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Department of Redundancy Department
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Ascension - Short Story -
09-01-2009, 06:26 AM
This is a short story I wrote just now. I've been up for almost 40 hours so don't bitch much about the typos please but I'd love to see some constructive criticism. I know I didn't give much descriptions but I'll probably work on that next time I write a short story. Also, if there are any typos that actually make it impossible for you to understand the actual story, please tell me; I'll correct them asap. If anyone actually enjoys it, which I doubt, I might add a few more chapters. If that happens, I'll make sure they are better written.
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It was a day just like any other; this tedious life prospect had already been engraved on his back. Memories of his joyful past came to mind as he looked at the overly excited monitors of Times Square. He was stuck in the middle of a yellow sea, filled with noxious gases and a putrid sense of decency, so it seemed like an interesting setting to reminisce.
Following his father’s footsteps, he joined the NYPD after graduating from high school at the age of 22; issues always found a way into his life, causing him to repeatedly fail in his studies. One of such issues was the gruesome murder of his mother when he was 15, which made his father start his own personal vendetta against organized crime in New York. He was an honourable man who followed the path of justice but the murder of his wife force him out of that path, filling him with vengeful thoughts. Slowly, his sanity started degrading until he ultimately committed suicide in the same place where his wife had been killed.
Thirteen years had passed since the death of his mother and now he was a simple NYPD detective with too much time on his hands. Crime rates had dropped for some unknown reason and cover businesses add all gone bankrupt. This was a boring time to be a law enforcer in NY, which was something without precedents. He looked at the passing clouds of pedestrians as he turned on the car radio; the speakers came to life, broadcasting an 80’s song. He didn’t enjoy it but he was too lazy to make a mix CD of his favourite songs so he had to make do with what he had. Suddenly, the cabs started moving, allowing him to move along the 7th until he reached Penn Station. Two officers showing grave faces approached his car as he parked; they looked like rookies so even a small robbery would leave them on the edge, therefore, the detective didn’t take much notice. The moment he opened the door of the car, a cloud of fumes invaded it, making it hard to breathe. Recent studies showed that the Big Apple had become the most polluted city in the world, and it was advisable to wear masks at all times. Of course, those wealthy could simply buy small neck implants that could purify the air before it reached the lungs but, of course, detective salaries don’t allow luxuries.
-Detective Blazvik, what took you so long, sir? – queried one of the officers.
-Let’s just say yellow isn’t my favourite colour. What’s the situation? Theft? Highjack?
-Murder, sir. – his face paled as he pronounced the word.
-Ha, let me guess: some idiot didn’t like the ticket prices? – the detective wasn’t surprised. Even though organized crime had disappeared, random thefts and murders kept happening.
-No, sir. CSI already searched every nook and corner but there was no evidence.
-You know, total lack of evidence IS evidence. Also, CSI gathers the evidence, but we are the ones who mould it into making sense. No prints or hair would probably mean someone who knows how to clean his steps well. Just interrogate the station’s janitors; it’s probably one of them.
-Sir, when I say no evidence, I mean nothing at all.
-Then it was a hit. Just check the victim’s history and you’ll find the one who ordered it. We have the technology. – he frowned as he attempted to close the door of the car, only to be stopped by the young officer.
-Just take a look at the scene. We wouldn’t call you guys if we could make anything out of this.
-Guys? – Blazvik sounded surprised.
-Detective Watson is already inside. – stated the officer while pointing to the main building of Penn Station.
Ever since the mob’s exodus it wasn’t normal for officers to call the Detective Department. Most crimes were fairly simple and even a child could figure them out. The detective got out of the car and started heading towards the building, with the two officers following him.
-Sir, your car is ope-. – The car lights flashed twice and the door closed itself – Ah, okay.
It had been a while since he last went to Penn Station; after a terrorist attack in 2013, the station was rebuilt from scratch and it became an overwhelming symbol of modern technology: sterile, cold and efficient. The automatic doors opened as he closed in and the urban fumes disappeared; public buildings were equipped with industrial sized purifiers for obvious reasons. The detective stood in the middle of a large lobby; the main building of the new Penn Station holds the command centre, security offices and the sanitation department of the whole station and entrance is forbidden to non-employees.
-Where’s the scene?
-It’s inside the security offices. – answered one of the officers.
-What? Where was the “security” part of the offices then?
-We don’t know, sir.
-Damn, weekend workers. – said Blazvik with a frown.
The place was clean of human life; everyone had been evacuated and the only people inside were the police, but those seemed to be all cooped up in the offices. The detective made his way to the security elevator, which would take him to the scene. As he entered, one of the officers immediately typed a code on elevator’s security pad.
-So you also need codes to get to the offices? Sweet… - a smirk appeared in his face
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The elevator was fast but no pressure could be felt since the stabilizers were operational.
-So the thing is going underground? What is this, a military facility?
-I was surprised too, sir, but it seems that the station has a connection with a military outpost nearby, just in case someone tries to recreate the bombing incident.
-Fair enough. But the only way to enter the security offices is by using a high-security elevator with scanning devices all over it or thought a military outpost. Either way, someone definitely noticed the murderer enter or leave. Maybe he is still in the building. But so much shit about one murder...
-You tell me, sir. Oh, we’re here.
The doors opened and a long corridor presented itself. The officers got out of the elevator first, just so they could lead the detective to the crime scene. There were many doors, each of them with its respective descriptive sign.
-Why do I get the feeling that gatlings will jump out of the plated walls any second now. – commented Blazvik, with a clear tone of mockery.
-Maybe it’s because they really will if you do anything to provoke the sensors. – the voice came from behind; a door had just opened and a man in a deep-blue suit made his appearance – Detective Josh Blazvik, I presume. Luke Bernard at your disposal.
-“The” Luke Bernard? I heard rumours that the Bernard Industries were the ones financing half of New York’s public facilities but never thought you’d come down here in person.
-What kind of good businessman doesn’t check his investments?
-Most likely the kind that doesn’t want to get involved in a murder investigation. But it seems you aren’t that bright, Mr. Bernard. – stated Blazvik, bashfully.
-No need to jest, detective, I’ll cooperate. By the way, hope you have a strong stomach... Some of your men don’t. – the businessman man started heading towards the elevator while chuckling softly.
Blazvik looked at the officers but both of them avoided eye contact.
-Don’t fucking tell me... Disgusting... – stated as he shook his head in disapproval. – Come on, lead the way...
-Yes, sir...
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