[UnknownFact2]

Eye Contact.


Sunny day, in the city, wandering around my lost dreams, and my dreams of lost dreams. There was no truth to be told about anything actually, only the moment. And what was the moment?

At first, I did not want to believe that reality was so unreal. But when I did, everything, everything turned blue. I felt connected to something bigger, something greater. Like if I was diving into a world full of fantasy.

And there I was, in that world. Alone, but not at all. I looked at my coffee, grabbed the cup, and drank a bit. It was delicious. It was real coffee. Everybody passed by me, nobody noticed me, but I noticed them, of course. It was like the air. Yes, like the air. Some people, made of air, bought coffee. Some other bough tea, or hot chocolate, or mate(*). And some of them bought cinnamon cakes, just like me. I grabbed my cup again. I drank a bit. I put the cup in the table, and ate a piece of my cinnamon cake. It was then, at that very moment, that reality went back to what it was a while ago. I became human again, and people stopped being made of air. And everybody noticed me, as I was noticing them. And you were there. I didn't know who you were, and you didn't know who I was either. But there was eye contact, and I loved your black eyes. That's how I knew, then, that I was going to get laid that night.

(*)

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[Ryuujin]

Gingaaa bishounen!

[AnimeReference]

Sunny day, in the city, wandering around my lost dreams, and my dreams of lost dreams. There was no truth to be told about anything , only the moment. And what was the moment?

At first, I did not want to believe that reality was so unreal. But when I did, everything, everything turned blue. I felt a connection to something bigger, something greater. As if I was diving into a world full of fantasy.

And there I was, in that world. Alone, but not at all. I insert vocab at my coffee, grabbed the cup, and drank a bit. It was delicious. It was real coffee. Everybody passed by me, nobody noticed me, but I noticed them, of course. They were like the air. Yes, like the air. These people, made of air, bought coffee. Some bought tea, hot chocolate, even mate(*). A few of them bought cinnamon cakes, just like me. I grabbed my cup again. I drank a bit. I put the cup in the table, and ate my piece of cinnamon cake. It was then, at that very moment, that reality insert vocab to what it was a while ago. I became human again, and people insert vocab being made of air. And everybody noticed me, as I was noticing them. And you were there. I didn't know who you were, and you didn't know who I was either. But there was eye contact, I loved your black eyes. That's how I knew, then, that I was insert romance that night.

great story, work on your vocab, ending makes you look like a prick
feel free to ignore

[gerreng]

@animereference I totally agree with last line makes writer look like a prick and for the love of #@$%# PLEASE proffread your work. I would have used the term douche to describe the last line.

[digritz]

animereference and gerreng, did you once consider that English is not his first language? Or did you just assume? You do know what happens when one assumes something don't you?

animereference, changing the line Some people, made of air, bought coffee. Some bought tea, to These people, made of air, bought coffee. Some bought tea. Is just idiotic with your statement you are trying to make a clear distinction between to too groups when there is none, aside from their choice of drink. It's unnecessary. Go back and study some more vocabulary before correcting others.

And gerreng "proffread your work"? How about you do the same proofread your work. that's what the lines that point out misspelled words are for. Don't worry I'm sure you'll get the hang of it.

As for the aforementioned vulgarity try reading Vladimir Nabokov or Ernest Hemingway before you condemn a statement such as the for being vulgar. If it flows from the story then it's part of the story. Or are you still reading Mothergoose. If so just how the hell do you think that old lady ended up with so many kids in one shoe? SHE GOT LAID, LOTS! Now grow up.

[Shadow Tearz]

at the begining i was like WOW then when i finished reading i was like o_O ......ur realy a pervy....*disappointed on u kid*

[UnknownFact2]

Last line is a silly joke. And hey, thanks for correcting my text
Yes, actually English is my third language...

I'm going to take these comments to edit the other story that I was going to post.

Originally Posted by digritz

with your statement you are trying to make a clear distinction between to too groups when there is none, aside from their choice of drink.

It's exactly like you said digritz

[Darkchao45]

Is how I felt when reading that....

[Kenny41]

i thought it was an interesting piece of work. liked it

[AnimeReference]

implying I like (or at least approve of) the works of Vladimir Nabokov or Ernest Hemingway.
Fame means nothing, an interesting story has the possibility of meaning; hence, having read this piece and having read nothing by Vladimir Nabokov or Ernest Hemingway, UnknownFact2's work is in fact better (to me).
further implying that I have a sound understanding of literature further than that of year 11 English. even if I did there is no guarantee of me having studied American novelists.

implying I was rude and insulted his work in some way

implying I don't prefer to distinguish people based on their preferences

implying that me suggesting changes in vocabulary would improve his work in any way (any suggestions I make will make the piece closer to my writing style, therefore ruin the purpose of someone other than me writing it)

implying what I said was anything more than friendly (there is a difference between sounding like a prick and being a prick. Saying he sounds like a prick implies he isn't. tl;dr friendly), yet objective opinion aimed at helping UnknownFact2 to improve his work

not that I have any obligation to explain any of this to you

next time: i try not to be misunderstood, you don't call an idea idiotic and love. love everywhere.